Today I started thinking about the road each of us travels. We are all part of the human race, but each one us has a different path, a different destiny, a different purpose. Sometimes, our paths cross with others, and sometimes not. Whatever your particular path or road you travel, I’d like to take a minute and remind you that we all travel the road of life. Most of us are so lonely that all we need is one person to reach out and show they care. When did our world become so busy that a family no longer has time to sit down and eat dinner together? Why is it that kids never talk to their parents anymore? Why are we all so apprehensive of each other? When did this become acceptable? Maybe the answers to these questions should look no further than in the mirror with myself included.
There are times myself when I fall victim to being busy or completely preoccupied in my own life that I neglect others in my life. Recently, my step sister was in the hospital for drinking too much. When I discovered the news on the phone, it came as a shock, because until that point, I had no clue that she had a drinking problem. One of my other step sisters was kind enough to pleasantly point out that our family should take a deeper interest in each other’s lives from now on. I told her that it wasn’t anything personal. I was just so preoccupied with my own dealings that I completely forgot about the people around me – the world around me. While, I don’t condone drinking too much, and while it’s certainly everyone’s responsibility to make your own decisions, the over drinking was more than likely a cry for help and a cry for being lonely. It’s easy to stand back and judge someone and see their problems for what they are. But, when you experience that problem or put yourself in their shoes, you being to understand why they have problems. While my step sister starts to clean up her life, hopefully more people will reach out to her and show her the world doesn’t have to be such a lonely place.
While, certainly the present, economic conditions we live in play a pivotal role, I would like to take a moment to delve at two of the biggest problems we face in our daily lives on the roads we travel which are loneliness and ignorance. While I have briefly described the point of loneliness, I haven’t delved into the root of that. You’re probably thinking well, it’s just simply being lonely or feeling lonely. But, it’s much deeper than that, and really for a large percentage of the world’s population, we experience this every day. Loneliness can take several forms. It can range from having little to no friends, no significant other, or even no one who can relate to you. The old adage suggests if you have one good friend that you can count on through everything, then you’re doing well. I won’t assume that all of you have that, but for those of you that do, congratulations, for you are part of the small majority. And, if you are lucky enough to have a significant other than you’re part of even a smaller majority. This seems to be a bigger problem. Because, so many men and women feel their lives aren’t complete due to not having that loving relationship in their lives. Although, certain things seem to suggest that it’s harder for men to be with women, for the men that strictly want to get into women’s pants, make it hard for the men who want a lasting relationship. In any event, why is it not as simple as just meeting a woman at a coffee shop and talking to her and developing a lasting connection? Why do so many people play games to avoid their fear of connections? Why do women fall for the bad guys who treat them badly? Why do some people never find true love? Well, if you’ve got the answers to these questions, then please tell me, because I certainly don’t. How do we confront these problems and solve them? The answer seems to lie in we need to be open to connecting to other people whether it’s romantically, friendly, professionally, or any way.
Another issue seems to be the one of ignorance. We see this mostly in today’s society through racism manifested in feelings of superiority for one’s own race or hatred towards another. This seems to have been a problem for decades that has arguably gotten better. For, things like the Civil Rights Movement and groups like the Black Panther Party, improvements have been made. We still have a long way to go. This is a prime example of people taking different roads in their life. A white man compared to a black man will undoubtedly experience a different path in life, but still travel down the road of life. Most of us can’t look past the color of skin to see the person for who they are. Now, there are several gray areas like the idea of interracial marriages and relationships, organizational membership, etc. So, I’m not going to speak on those topics, for everyone probably has an opinion on each of those topics. But, I am going to suggest does it really matter what color skin people have if they can do something outstanding. Spike Lee is a very talented filmmaker. Does it matter if he’s black? Not to me. For, we all have something to excel at.
Now, please understand my intent here. One of the hardest things about living is to feel alienated from the world around you. A common misconception is that we choose to alienate ourselves, but I don’t think it’s that simple. There are factors in our lives which prohibit us from truly connecting to the world around us whether it’s our daily lives, other’s lives, or the mediated messages we see and hear. Another famous adage tells us that there are six billion people in the world and sometimes all you need is one. Fear of never having anyone to relate to, being alone, or never being understood truly paralyzes us into a deepened core of terror. Just because a person looks okay on the outside doesn’t mean they aren’t struggling on the inside. So, am I suggesting that we must change everything about ourselves and this world to make this happen? By no means. Although, I think the world can always change. What I am suggesting is that we should stop and revaluate our lives and determine what it is we’re chasing and what it is we are doing. Is money as important as making a difference in someone else’s life? You don’t have to be someone’s deep friend or lover to make a difference. Sometimes, all you have to do is try to understand them and show them you care.
-- Scott Harrison Odom --
-- Written on Saturday, June 20, 2009 --
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